WTF: Spider-Man's A Bad Guy

I found this on Google+ from one of our followers Osni Winklemann (dope name by the way). I clicked the link to figure out where it was from, but like most things on Tumblr who the fuck can tell. I just thought it was funny and now you get to stare at it too and paste together your own narrative. Here's mine:

"Before becoming the Avenging Spider-Man, Peter Parker was better known as The Green Spider! Realizing that the Green Hornet kind of already had that shtick and tired of getting his ass handed to him by Captain Jovial America, he retired to work at Subway as the guy with way too much arm hair making your meatball sub."

If you look real close, you can see his pecker!